After being really excited last week that I was only 200grams short of having lost 20kgs, I kinda slipped off the wagon.
I have had chocolate, pizza, maccas and not enough water since Friday and all without tracking any points :(
So come weigh-in this morning I found I had lost my 200grams I needed to reach 20kg lost, but I don't feel like I deserve it at all.
I am really disappointed in myself. I know I was using the excuse that I am due for my period this week for wanting junk food, but really when I search deep inside of me I am scared about losing weight.
I am now slightly smaller than I was when I got married 6 years ago (tried on my wedding dress last Friday night and it fits better now than it did on the day) and I guess that triggered my slide into high calorie and high fat food.
I scared about how my body is changing... I have gone lumpy- ok I was always big but my skin was firm, now it's getting lots of dimples and is starting to "hang". I'm scared that if I don't find me attractive then how will my husband? I don't even know how he ever did.
urgh... hope everyone is having a better day than I am
Bella
Well you might have mucked about this week, but you didn't lose all 20kg by accident - you must have worked hard for that, so congratulate yourself!
ReplyDeleteYou can still earn that final 200g by being strong this week. If you don't, last week's indulgences may catch up with you!!
I can't answer the lumpy question. I hope that as you continue to lose weight, the lumps will go away too. I'm certain I will have excess skin, but I'm telling myself that empty, excess skin is better/healthier than stretched, full-of-fat skin.
Celebrate you losses and try to feel better about yourself chick!!
Regarding your husband finding you attractive... I was terrified about my boyfriend feeling/seeing me when we started dating... But it turns out guys don't notice stuff like that unless you point it out!!! How Fab!!!! He probably thinks your just as beautiful (if not more so) as ever! ♥
ReplyDeleteJust fake it till you feel it!
PS: CONGRATS ON LOOSING 20KG - THATS FANTASTIC WORK!! KEEP IT UP GIRL!
♥